3/10/11 Feeling Okay is Not Good Enough - I Want To Be Well
I am beginning to realize how easy it is to settle for feeling just "okay." Since I have been feeling better I have not taken care of my body as well as when I was in the thick of all the pain. A little discomfort is easier to deal with than total change. Change takes discipline, and discipline is hard...especially if you really love something you have to give up.
Yesterday I worked on my new computer until the wee hours of the morning. I love working at night. It's quiet. I can think. I seem to work best in those late night hours. Unfortunately staying up late doesn't jive with my wellness plan. I'm beginning to understand that I am going to have to give up those quiet midnight hours for a greater good--my health.
My fiance says you have to invite things into your life that are compatible with your larger goals. Keeping a consistent sleeping and eating schedule, cooking fresh meals, practicing yoga/meditation...these are consistent with what SHOULD be my greatest goal--Total Wellness. So why for 3 weeks of this month did I chose aches, pains and mental haziness over total wellness? I'll tell you why -
Because even though I thrive on routine (most of us do) I crave the freedom to work 5 hours on the computer then order a pizza because there's no time left to cook.
Because I want to dine out and have the entire menu to order from.
I want to STAY UP LATE
I want to drink too much on occasion.
And I don't want to be held hostage to my routine.
The funny thing is, when I do stick with my routine I feel happier with myself (body, mind and spirit) than any of those other "freedoms" can bring me. In fact, it's those "freedoms" that are holding me hostage in a body of pain. Bad eating habits cause my stomach to hurt. Staying up late throws my entire sleep schedule off. And alcohol is always very taxing to my system. Which is why it's never long before I come back to my wellness routine. I remember how it feels to feel good...and I want it back. When I do yoga consistently I feel strong, humble, respectful and peaceful, stable and CENTERED and so grateful just to be alive. Sex is better when I do yoga regularly. Everything is better. I know from experience that the longer I stay away the harder it is to return. I know people who have stayed away too long and don't even remember what it's like to feel good. They suffer on a daily basis and don't even realize they are capable of changing their reality.
I want to be well, but I want cake...and to eat it too. And maybe I can...in moderation. So I will stay up late and drink too much...but only once in awhile, and only after considering the state of my body.
Consideration and moderation - I'll keep practicing!
Yesterday I worked on my new computer until the wee hours of the morning. I love working at night. It's quiet. I can think. I seem to work best in those late night hours. Unfortunately staying up late doesn't jive with my wellness plan. I'm beginning to understand that I am going to have to give up those quiet midnight hours for a greater good--my health.
My fiance says you have to invite things into your life that are compatible with your larger goals. Keeping a consistent sleeping and eating schedule, cooking fresh meals, practicing yoga/meditation...these are consistent with what SHOULD be my greatest goal--Total Wellness. So why for 3 weeks of this month did I chose aches, pains and mental haziness over total wellness? I'll tell you why -
Because even though I thrive on routine (most of us do) I crave the freedom to work 5 hours on the computer then order a pizza because there's no time left to cook.
Because I want to dine out and have the entire menu to order from.
I want to STAY UP LATE
I want to drink too much on occasion.
And I don't want to be held hostage to my routine.
The funny thing is, when I do stick with my routine I feel happier with myself (body, mind and spirit) than any of those other "freedoms" can bring me. In fact, it's those "freedoms" that are holding me hostage in a body of pain. Bad eating habits cause my stomach to hurt. Staying up late throws my entire sleep schedule off. And alcohol is always very taxing to my system. Which is why it's never long before I come back to my wellness routine. I remember how it feels to feel good...and I want it back. When I do yoga consistently I feel strong, humble, respectful and peaceful, stable and CENTERED and so grateful just to be alive. Sex is better when I do yoga regularly. Everything is better. I know from experience that the longer I stay away the harder it is to return. I know people who have stayed away too long and don't even remember what it's like to feel good. They suffer on a daily basis and don't even realize they are capable of changing their reality.
I want to be well, but I want cake...and to eat it too. And maybe I can...in moderation. So I will stay up late and drink too much...but only once in awhile, and only after considering the state of my body.
Consideration and moderation - I'll keep practicing!
So glad to hear you're on the right track, Joy- and congratulations on your new MAC!
ReplyDeleteHope you really let go and enjoyed your time away with your sweetheart.
Love you.