1/3/11 Tuesday—Night of Nightmares

NIGHTMARE:  Read it or not.  I had the worst dream last night.  It wasn’t as bad as that other one, but it was as vivid and scary.  I was at a water park.   Nick, Luke and I were there together.  I don’t remember there being any fun part except the anticipation of going on the rides.  Somehow I got separated from Luke and Nick.  I came upon a group of people that ushered me and a few others into an area separate from the park.  After they gathered us up, the ushers turned to the ushered and unanimously chanted a rhyme about how no one must stray, all of us stay.  It sounds anything but scary, but the way they looked at us with those dead eyes as they chanted was terrifying.    There were many tunnels, slides and stairwells to try to use to escape, but they either led back to the holding area or to places where people were waiting to chase you.  We all tried again and again to leave, hiding under floor boards of one of the water park decks, watching the feet overhead, hoping no one spotted us, but they sensed us there and as one huge, angry eye peered through crack in the floor boards an arm reached around the side of the deck and pulled me from my hiding place.  In our last attempt, we crept quietly past the dead eyed people, to the bathroom area.  I had to pee but there was no toilet so I pulled my bathing suit to the side and stood in a half squat over a hole in the deck.  We moved on to a stairwell that looked like it might be our escape.  It led to a sliding board.  One after the other, we jumped over the rail and slid down the slide.  I was last.  As I came to the end of the slide I saw I had to choose a direction—one led down to another stairwell and another to a door.   The guy before me chose the door and looked surprised.  A good surprise or a bad surprise?   As the slide came to an end I jumped off the end, scared as hell I would choose wrong and be taken back by the pool people.  Before my feet hit the ground I heard the sound of birds chirping and bells ringing.  My alarm was going off.  That dream made getting up easy.  Weird. Any dream interpreters out there? 

6:10 am Woke up feeling the aftershocks of the nightmare.   Feeling exhausted.   Body/mind raced all night.  I took 1 Ayurvedic sleeping pill last night.  Did it help or hurt? 

I got through my entire morning routine today!  It was quicker than I would have liked, but it’s a start.  I took my morning probiotics.  Then did the abhyanga.  (Self oil massage.)  20 minute yoga practice, then 5 minutes of Pranayama.  (Breathing practice—I did alternate nostril breathing today—you pinch one side of your nose closed and inhale in, then pinch that side closed and exhale out the other nostril.  Keeping that nostril open, you inhale, then pinch that side closed and exhale out the other nostril.  It is supposed to calm the nervous system and balance both sides of the brain. I will post a video explaining this process soon.  Then 3 minutes of Savasana (A yoga pose that embodies complete relaxation.)  And last, 5 minutes of seated meditation.  

7:45 am Running late.  Made Luke’s lunch while breakfast cooked.   Skipped makeup and put on the same jeans I wore yesterday.    I will have to wake up earlier than 6:10 if I want to make my morning practice longer, and wear something different than yesterday’s outfit.  The eat-and-run thing is the opposite of what I am supposed to be doing, which is to eat very calmly with no distractions, and to sit quietly for 5 minutes afterwards to let the digestion process begin.  Ayurveda is hard.

8:20  Out the door, late.   

8:40 am Work.  Feeling exhausted and pain is already starting to settle in. 

8pm ache check: not bad.  Joints hurt as always, but that grinding back pain is not present.  Very tired and very itchy.  

FOOD: 

Breakfast—a stewed apple followed by Rice and Shine with maple syrup, ghee and rice milk.   

12:30 Lunch ON TIME.  I succeeded in keeping my eating schedule between 12 and 1pm.   My fare, although healthy and prepared by Essene, Philadelphia’s premier and prestigious health food store, was not great for my constitution.  The adzuki beans and brown rice in the Adzuki Bean Stew were a no-no.  According to my Ayurvedic doctor they are too hard for me to digest.  The Yucon brand guacamole was prepared probably 2  weeks ago,  and the Eden brand blue chips are a processed food.   And what was I thinking buying this 39 cent honey, chocolate mint?   I already know sugar is not good for my system.   And the whole time I was eating my mind was elsewhere.   Does sitting for 5 minutes to journal count as a quiet start to the digestive process?    Walking or lying down is supposed to help the digestive process.  Walking is the last thing I feel like doing right now, guess what I’m gonna do instead. 

I ended up getting off my butt for a walk.  Part of my motivation being that my poor dog Charlie who comes to work with me every day, has been somewhat neglected since I have started this whole wellness trip.  Cooking and cleaning up after ever meal takes a lot of time!  So does yoga, meditation and now writing this blog.  So we went for a 10 minute walk around Society Hill.  I made it a point to look at the sky, which was beautiful today. 

And then came the nap.  Closed my eyes for a minute and didn’t open them again for 25.  Woops.  I was off the clock, but it still feels really wrong sleeping at work.  

7:00 dinner…was supposed to eat at 6.  Made a really nice dal with red lentils, butternut squash, green chilies, coriander and mustard seeds over jasmine rice.  I took the recipe from http://www.vazhayila.com/2010/10/butternut-squash-dal.html   I added a teaspoon of ghee after I plated my dish.  I didn’t have red chilies or curry leaves, and I meant to add spinach at the end but forgot.  The dish was satisfying and delicious.  

Still settling into my new blog.  I promise I will try to start making them shorter!  Or maybe I'll put the food information at the end, for those who aren't interested?  Guidance anyone?